working together - moving forwards
SO What can I expect?
In therapy, you can come and find a safe place to investigate those inner thoughts and processes, it's a place where you can come and understand what makes you tick, understand why you react the way you do, or why you find it 'impossible' to make the changes you wish you could make. In partnership, we can work together in a non-judgmental, safe and accepting environment where you can begin to move forwards.
As a person, I am warm, caring and engaging, I am definitely not here to judge you and I want you to know that this is a safe place where you can bring up absolutely anything, I won’t be shocked or disappointed, as the chances are, I’ve either heard it all before, or I have made those very same mistakes myself at some point in my own life.
People wear ‘masks’ all the time, and I’m not talking about Covid face-masks I’m talking about the kind of ‘masks’ we use to hide who we really are because of fear, because we are insecure and we are afraid we will be ‘found out’. We feel we need to protect ourselves from judgment, from condemnation, from disapproval. Well, you can be sure of one thing, I am here to encourage you that you won’t find any of that here. With me, you can be real, and I will also be real with you.
Wearing these types of ‘masks’ uses a lot of energy, it drains us and it’s really hard work to keep up appearances. But here, in therapy with me, you have the freedom and the permission to take off the ‘mask’, to be fully real, to be fully open and to be fully heard.
As Oscar Wilde said, “Be yourself; everyone else is taken.” and the psalmist wrote, “I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.”
We weren’t born with masks, so the good news is, we can learn to take them off, and we can discover who we really are, and who you are is someone of great worth.
I believe in the power of change, I believe that as we seek the truth about our past and our present difficulties, that the truth helps to set us free from our past traumas and the present issues in our lives.
There is a direct correlation between freedom and truth. To find your own freedom, you must first discover the root cause, where does the behaviour come from, where did you learn your coping strategies and how do they then relate to your life now?
"Our lives are controlled by the thoughts and beliefs we have about ourselves, or what we believe others think about us, the questions we ask ourselves and the situations we find ourselves in. This then controls our emotions and how we feel and this then dictates the decisions that we make for our lives".
I use an integrative model of counselling and a variety of methods including Creative Therapies, TA, REBT, Psychodynamic, and also Christian counselling where required.
"Rarely can a response make something better, what makes something better is connection". Brené Brown.
This is so true, I have been counselling since 2002 and I have found that quote to not only be true in my client work but also in my own personal life.
What counts more than anything is the relationship between client and counsellor. Without that critical factor, you can have the best 'model' of counselling on the planet, but without the relationship, then it is simply meaningless theories and words.
"The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out". Proverbs 20:5